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How many letters are there in the alphabet?

Twenty-four, because E.T. went home.

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Animals

Why did the big cat get disqualified from the Olympics?

For being a cheetah.

Mummy music?Music

What kind of music do mummies listen to?

Wrap music.

Professional

What happens when a realtor commits a crime?

They're put on house arrest.

Animals

What did the bee say to the naughty bee?

Bee-hive yourself.

Holiday

What do you get if you cross Father Christmas with a detective?

Santa Clues.

Animals

What kind of dog loves to eat?

A Chow.

Vehicles

A sheep walks into a car dealership. What type of car does it ask to test drive?

A lamborghini.

Puns

What did the outlet say to the power cord on their date?

Sorry, I just don't feel a spark.

Puns

Why should you wear leather when trying to stay unnoticed?

Because it's made of hide.

Puns

Who won the race between two balls of string?

They were tied.

Holiday

What does winter fat turn into?

Spring rolls.

Education

What's 90 degrees and never incorrect?

A right triangle.

Puns

Why did the Roman chicken cross the road?

Because she was afraid someone would caesar.

Vehicles

What vehicle works the hardest?

A try-cycle.

Puns

How does a single horse RSVP to a party?

They're going stag.

Sports

What tea do footballers drink?

Penaltea.