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How does a polar bear build a house?

Igloos it together.

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People

What do you call a handsome runner?

Dashing.

Animals

Why should you not pamper a cow?

You'll get spoiled milk.

Puns

What shape has a knighthood?

Cir-cle.

Melon married?Food & Drinks

Why didn't the melons get married?

Because they cantaloupe.

Professional

What did the angry customer say to the mechanic who couldn't figure out what was wrong with his car?

You auto-know better!

Sports

When fish play football, who is the captain?

The team's kipper.

Food & Drinks

Why did the tortilla chip start dancing?

Because they put on the salsa.

Animals

Why did the turkey cross the road?

To prove he wasn't chicken.

Animals

How does a squid go into battle?

Well-armed.

a cat is playing with a roll of toilet paper in the bathroomAnimals

Why did the cat go to the bathroom in the trash can?

Because it's a litter box.

Entertainment

What did the baby laptop call her father?

Data.

Family

What do cubs eat when their mom is out of town?

Bluebeary Pop-Tarts.

Science

What did the dad say when the boy asked him to explain the solar eclipse to him?

No sun.

Sports

Why did the basketball player have so many good arguments?

He was the point guard.

Animals

What kind of horse can swim underwater without coming up for air?

A seahorse.

Puns

What kind of tiles can't you stick on walls?

Reptiles.