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How do you stop an angry elephant from charging?

Take away its credit cards.

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Puns

Wanna hear my favorite potassium joke?

K.

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Puns

What do you get if you cross a hen with a dog?

Pooched eggs.

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Puns

Where would you put an injured insect?

In an antbulance.

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Food & Drinks

What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup?

Anyone can roast beef.

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People

What do you call an 80-year-old cheerleader?

Old yeller.

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Puns

Where do colds go on vacation?

Germ-any.

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Sports

Why did someone ask the baseball player to punch them?

He was the designated hitter.

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Current Events

What's a storm cloud's favorite Garth Brooks song?

When the Thunder Rolls.

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Animals

What do you call a kangaroo's lazy joey?

Pouch potato.

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Puns

Where do sheep get their hair cut?

At the baa baas.

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Puns

What kind of things does a farmer talk about when he is milking cows?

Udder nonsense.

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Animals

How do you stop an angry elephant from charging?

Take away its credit cards.

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bird drinking?Animals

How many beers does it take to get a tropical bird drunk?

Toucans!

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Entertainment

Where do baby ghosts go during the day?

In dayscare.

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Animals

What is a parrot's favorite game?

Hide and speak.

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Animals

Why don't koalas categorize as bears?

They don't have the right koalafications.

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