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How do eggs end a TV show?

That's all, yolks!

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Professional

My boss instructed me to set up the company's 401k.

I told her I don't think anyone on the team can run that far.

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Animals

What kind of dog chases anything red?

A bull dog.

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The Seagulls?Animals

Why do seagulls fly over the sea?

Because if they flew over the bay they'd be bagels.

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Professional

Why couldn't the couple get married at the library?

It was all booked up.

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Professional

What did the NSA employee say when her friend tried to tell her a new joke?

Heard it.

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Entertainment

What superhero often gets mistaken for photography equipment?

The Flash.

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The Politician?Political

What's the difference between a politician and a snail?

One is slimy, a pest, and leaves a trail everywhere and the other is a snail.

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Holiday

Why aren't there any knock-knock jokes about the United States?

Because freedom rings.

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Balanced Checked?Puns

She Needed Her Balance Checked!

Today at the bank, an old lady asked me to check her balance. So I pushed her over!

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Animals

What do you call a litter of young dogs who have come in from the snow?

Slush puppies.

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Puns

What did the rug say to the floor?

I've got you covered.

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Mummy music?Music

What kind of music do mummies listen to?

Wrap music.

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Animals

What's a glow worm's favorite song?

Wake me up before you glow glow.

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Puns

What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.

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Family

Which family member is always relieved?

A ne-phew.

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Holiday

What's Father Christmas called when he takes a rest while delivering presents?

Santa pause.

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