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How did the vampire start his letter?
Tomb it may concern...
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Political
Why did the senator bring cookies to the congress session?
He heard they were working on treat-ies.
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Education
Why did the student eat their homework?
Because the teacher said it was a piece of cake.
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Education
What do you call a pencil that has two erasers?
Pointless.
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Animals
Why couldn't the leopard hide?
He was always spotted.
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Animals
What do you call a big fish who makes you an offer you can't refuse?
The Codfather.
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Outdoors
What's another term for a sleeping bag?
A nap sack.
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Outdoors
Where does a camper keep his money?
In a river bank.
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Holiday
Why did the elf push his bed into the fireplace?
He wanted to sleep like a log.
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Animals
Why couldn't the leopard play hide and seek?
Because he was always spotted.
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Food & Drinks
Why was Billy fired from the banana shop?
He wouldn't stop throwing away the bent ones.
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Animals
Why did the turkey cross the road?
To prove he wasn't chicken.
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Education
Who invented fractions?
Henry the 1/8th.
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Puns
What is a horse's favorite sport?
Stable tennis.
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Food & Drinks
What pasta is always ready for a formal event?
Bow tie.
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Animals
What kind of dog wears a uniform and medals?
A guard dog.
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Animals
What do you call a golden retriever at the beach in July?
A hot dog.
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