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How did the vampire start his letter?

Tomb it may concern...

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Political

Why did the senator bring cookies to the congress session?

He heard they were working on treat-ies.

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Education

Why did the student eat their homework?

Because the teacher said it was a piece of cake.

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Education

What do you call a pencil that has two erasers?

Pointless.

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Animals

Why couldn't the leopard hide?

He was always spotted.

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Animals

What do you call a big fish who makes you an offer you can't refuse?

The Codfather.

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Outdoors

What's another term for a sleeping bag?

A nap sack.

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Outdoors

Where does a camper keep his money?

In a river bank.

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Holiday

Why did the elf push his bed into the fireplace?

He wanted to sleep like a log.

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hide and seek?Animals

Why couldn't the leopard play hide and seek?

Because he was always spotted.

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Food & Drinks

Why was Billy fired from the banana shop?

He wouldn't stop throwing away the bent ones.

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Animals

Why did the turkey cross the road?

To prove he wasn't chicken.

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Inventing fractions?Education

Who invented fractions?

Henry the 1/8th.

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Puns

What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis.

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Food & Drinks

What pasta is always ready for a formal event?

Bow tie.

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Animals

What kind of dog wears a uniform and medals?

A guard dog.

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Animals

What do you call a golden retriever at the beach in July?

A hot dog.

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