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How are you liking that anti-gravity book?
It's impossible to put down!
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Professional
My boss instructed me to set up the company's 401k.
I told her I don't think anyone on the team can run that far.
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Vehicles
What's a car's favorite TV show?
Law and Order SUV.
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Holiday
What do you call Santa's Helpers?
Subordinate clauses.
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Animals
What do chickens serve at birthday parties?
Coop-cakes.
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Animals
Where do pigs sleep during the summer?
In a ham-mock.
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Animals
Why did the chicken cross the basketball court?
He heard the referee calling fowls.
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Puns
Imagine you're in a room with no windows and no doors, how do you get out?
Stop imagining.
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Animals
What do you get if you cross a trout with an apartment?
A flat fish.
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Food & Drinks
What's a horse's favorite fruit?
Straw-berries.
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Puns
When you die, what part of the body dies last?
The pupils... they dilate.
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Professional
What time is your dentist appointment?
Tooth hurt-y.
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Animals
What do bees chew?
Bumble gum.
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People
Why is Peter Pan always flying?
He neverlands.
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Puns
What is a pig's favorite ballet?
Swine Lake.
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Outdoors
Where do logs like to go on hikes?
The woods.
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Animals
What constantly moves forward but never learns anything?
A school of fish.
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