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What is the difference between Yankee fans and dentists?

One roots for the yanks, and the other yanks for the roots.

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Why quit taxi?Professional

Why did the man give up being a taxi driver?

There was too much talking behind his back.

Holiday

What does Father Christmas suffer from if he gets stuck in a chimney?

Claustrophobia.

Puns

What do insects learn at school?

Mothmatics.

Animals

What do you call a golden retriever at the beach in July?

A hot dog.

People

Who is a Dutch cat's favorite actor?

Tom Holland.

Puns

What do you call a woman who sets fire to all her bills?

Bernadette.

a person is serving food from a colorful Indian food buffetAnimals

What animal loves Indian food?

A dal-matian.

Animals

Why do elephants have trunks?

Because they've no pockets to put things in.

Music

What's a chiropractor's favorite genre of music?

Hip pop.

a nurse attends to four babies each in their own hospital bassinetPuns

What do you call it when the maternity ward is low-staffed?

A mid-wife-crisis!

Food & Drinks

How does a cucumber turn into a pickle?

It goes through a jarring experience.

Puns

Why were the animal shelters at full capacity in the spring?

It kept raining cats and dogs.

Family

What do you call the grandmother on your speed dial?

InstaGram.

Entertainment

What's the name of the winner of the chicken-eating contest?

The Lord of the Wings.

Entertainment

What did the fisherman say to the magician?

Pick a cod, any cod.

Animals

Why didn't the chicken cross the road?

Because he was a "chicken".